There’s something extra magical about having a fling in the summer time. Just look at all the movies that are focused on summer romance. From the old classics like Grease, Summertime and a Summer’s Place to newer favorites like The Notebook, there’s something about summer that makes things a little sweeter and romantic. So, why not embrace all the good vibes?

I’m of the firm belief that even if they don’t end up going anywhere, summer flings are good for the soul.

A few years ago, I was coming off a string of dating disappointments and breakups. It was summer and I wasn’t even considering getting serious with anyone new. That’s when I met him. I was at a barbeque with a bunch of friends and he was manning the grill. Tall, handsome and with abs for days, we bonded over the fact that he grew up in the town where I went to college. A few nights later, he messaged me on Facebook and we ended up going for drinks. That was the beginning of our summer fling. We only hung out for a weeks and it was definitely fun while it lasted. I was disappointed when things ended between us, but looking back I see that our fling was exactly what I needed at the time. I needed to live in the moment and not take everything so seriously. I needed to get my mojo back and my summer fling did exactly that.

Here’s what I’ve learned: while fun and steamy, not every summer romance has to turn into a long lasting, serious relationship – and that’s totally OK.

If you’re thinking of having a summer fling (or are in the midst of one) here are a few things you can do to get the most out of the experience.

1. Get out of your normal routine.

If you’re looking for a summer fling, the first order of business is to shake up your usual routine. If you’re usually glued to your computer or phone, get outside and see what’s out there IRL. Check out your friend’s barbeque. Hit that new rooftop bar with your friends. Just. Get. Outside. If you’re usually drawn to super serious bookish types online, try dating outside your usual type. Remember, you’re not necessarily looking for a long term relationship – you’re looking to mix things up.

2. Don’t be afraid of age difference.

In fact, embrace it. In the case of my summer fling, the guy was younger than me and it worked out perfectly. He was in his mid-twenties and was more interested in having fun than getting into anything serious. I got to hang out with a guy who was hot and knew how to have fun with zero commitment. It was a win/win.

3. Make sure that you choose someone who is looking for the same thing.

My fling worked because neither of us were looking for anything serious. When looking for a summer fling it’s crucial that you find someone who is after something similar. Don’t go after people who have made it very clear that they’re looking for a serious commitment. The last thing you want is to get involved with someone who has completely different expectations for the relationship and end up hurting their feelings in the process.

4. It should feel easy.

Being with this person should feel fun and easy. Look for someone who has a similar communication style as you and is easy-going when it comes to making plans. If it doesn’t feel fun and easy, look elsewhere.

5. Embrace the idea of a hard and fast timeline.

The best summer flings happen when the relationship has a set timeline. For example, one of you is only in town for the summer or you meet each other while travelling – this is perfect. When it comes to dating, far too often we’re so concerned about where “things are going” that it becomes distracting. The point of a summer fling is to live in the moment and appreciate the time you do have together.

6. Don’t try and make it into something that it’s not.

The easiest way to put a damper on a hot summer fling is by trying to turn it into something that it’s not. If you try and dig into your claws in or scratch too deep beneath the surface, you might discover things that kill the magic. Let the fling be what it is – a fun, summer romance, that’s available for a limited time only.