Body language is a huge part of dating and attraction. From eye contact to how they position their body towards you – when you meet someone in person, there are so many non-verbal cues that you can tap into that gage whether someone is interested in you. One of the biggest challenges of meeting people through online dating  is that you don’t have access to their body language. When you’re trying to gage whether someone is interested in you and might be a good fit, all you have to go on is what pops up on your computer or smartphone screen.

Because online dating can feel a lot more casual and low pressure than meeting someone in person, it’s easy to think “they’re just words on a screen. It doesn’t matter how I say it, just that I put the info out there.” However, this couldn’t be further from the truth. There is a body language equivalent for online dating and you need to make sure yours is saying the right things. Here are a few tips to keep in mind.

1. Use clear language –

When it comes to online and text communications, misunderstandings often occur when one or both parties do not communicate clearly. For example, if you’re hoping to make plans with someone, don’t say: “So, um. I was thinking that maybe it might be cool, if you know we met up sometime. Or not. So, maybe you could call me or something.” Newsflash: Life is not one big Carly Rae Jepsen song. Although dating can definitely make you feel vulnerable, this kind of wishy washy communication will get you nowhere. You shouldn’t have to try and guess whether someone is asking you out. Saying something like “I’d love to go for a drink with you Saturday if you’re free. How about we go to Venetos at 8pm. Text me back if you’re available” is so much more assertive and clear. It also leaves the door open for the other person to make an equally clear response (“Venetos sounds great, but how about we do 9pm instead?”) Bingo!

2. Follow up –

If you want to send the message that you’re a mature and well-organized adult, the online dating body language equivalent is the follow up. If you’ve set a date with someone, nothing beats a polite follow up to confirm plans. Whenever I’ve made plans with someone, I always like receiving a message a day or two before that says something like, “I hope you’ve had a good week. I’m just checking to see if we’re still on for tonight.” It’s the thoughtful and responsible thing to do. Plus, if there was any confusion or miscommunication on either end, this provides an opportunity to clear things up. Not to mention – if they confirm plans, you get to tell them you’re excited to see them (which is never a bad thing!)

3. Don’t use vague language –

An easy way to improve your online dating body language is by banishing words like “whatever” from your dating vocabulary. Instead of responding to questions with “whatever” “maybe” or “I don’t know” try using a clear “yes” or “no.” Not only does this make it easier for the other person to communicate with you, if you’re hoping to show that you’re interested in them, an enthusiastic “yes!” goes a heck of a lot further than a “I don’t know. Whatevs!”

4. Do use proper punctuation and grammar –

Who would you rather go out with? Someone who sends this message: “hey i thought yr profile looks really gr8 would love to get to know you better whut iz yr fave movie” or this message “Hey! I thought your profile looks really great. I would love to get to know you better. What is your favorite movie?” My point exactly. Punctuation and grammar are important. They show that you’re a grownup who cares about how they present themselves to the world. Failure to use proper spelling and punctuation, is the online dating equivalent of showing up to a date wearing a shirt with a giant stain on it.

5. Don’t go overboard with the emoticons and LOLs –

Because it’s often hard to read someone’s mood through text or email, it’s sometimes nice to throw in a happy face or two. Same goes for the occasional LOL. However, be careful that you’re not using either of these things as a substitute for actual punctuation. There’s something off-putting about someone who uses multiple smiley faces after every. single. sentence. It’s the online dating body language equivalent of a creepy grin that just won’t go away. The same applies to the LOL. If I read, “Your photos are really nice LOL” I’m going to wonder a) what exactly is so hilarious about my photos and b) are they being sarcastic?! Needless to say, only use these features when it’s appropriate. Got it, LOL? (See what I did there?)

Be clear. Follow up. Use proper punctuation. Reign in your emoticon and LOL use. If you follow these basic principles you’re sure to impress potential dates with your excellent online dating body language!