The period between Halloween and New Years has historically been known as “peak breakup season.” There are many theories about why this is, but basically it boils down to the fact that spending the holidays with your meaningful other can be a huge commitment – financially, emotionally and time-wise. Most of us don’t want to invest our precious resources into someone in this way, if we’re not really sure about them.

Spending the holidays with someone that you’re on the fence about isn’t fair to the other person or you. So, as much as breaking up with someone before the holidays sucks (when are breakups ever good?) sometimes, it’s for the best. While I’m not suggesting that you go out and immediately break-up with the person you’re dating (that’s just ridiculous!) the pre-holidays is the perfect time to do a “dating check-up” and take stock of your relationship, to ensure that everyone has the best possible holiday season.

If you’re not sure about the person you’re dating, here are a few things to keep in mind.

1) Do you want them to meet and spend time with your family?

If you’ve just started dating, this question is probably a non-issue – after all, depending on your family situation you may not be ready to introduce your date to your relatives for a while. However, if you’ve been dating for awhile and you’re trying to figure out where the relationship is going, “meeting the parents” is a great litmus test. Can you envision this person sitting at the dinner table with you and your family as you enjoy a holiday meal together?

Meeting the parents is always a bit nerve-wracking for everyone involved, but if  you’re eager for your meaningful other to meet and/or spend time with your family (nerves and potential awkwardness be damned!) then this is a good sign that you see a future with this person. On the other hand, if you can’t picture them hanging out with your family or the worse, the idea fills you with utter dread, this may be a sign that you need to evaluate your relationship.

2) Are you interested in meeting their family and/or friends?

Newsflash: the holidays aren’t just about you and your commitments. It’s a extremely busy season and it might feel like at times, that you’re pulled in a bunch of different directions – especially if you’re in a relationship. If you’re dating someone, there’s a good chance that you’re going to be given the opportunity to meet and interact with their friends, family and/or coworkers. If the thought of this makes you say, “Sure! Bring it on!” – that’s awesome. Keep this person around. If you see a future with someone, you want to get to know everything about them – even if it means attending a corny office party or two together.

But, if the thought of devoting any of your precious holiday schedule to their “stuff” seems completely unappealing and feels more “ugh” than “yay!” this is a key sign that maybe you’re just not that into them. It all comes down to the question, “am I willing to invest time into this person?” If the answer is no, it’s time to move on.

3) Do you want to buy them a holiday present?

Let’s get real – the holidays can be really expensive. If you’re already imagining the super amazing Star Wars pillowcase and comforter set that you’re going to buy your sweetie – good for you. I’m sure they’ll love it. When it comes to dating during the holidays, you should be willing to drop some dime on the person you’re with – whether if it’s for a nice dinner together or a simple bouquet of flowers. Even you’re low on cash, you should be excited to do something special for the person you’re with. If you’re not and you can’t fathom spending any of your resources on them, well, my friend, I think you have your answer right there.

4) You don’t see a future with them.

If you’ve answered “no” to all of the questions above, it means that you just don’t see a future with the person you are dating. If you did, you’d want them to meet the people that are important to you and you’d be willing to devote time and/or other resources to the relationship. For many people, spending time together over the holidays means translates to “I see a future together.” If this isn’t the case, have the courage to let the person go, in lieu of misleading them.

5) You’re not happy.

It’s that simple. If you fight all the time and/or you’re just not feeling the relationship at all, it’s OK to cut your losses. Often we search for a “big” reason to break up, when being unhappy is reason enough. Do you both a favor and don’t bring that unhappiness into the New Year.