When it comes to the modern dating scene, technology is a real double edged sword. We can now instantly connect with thousands of singles from all over the world from the comfort of our smartphones and show our interest with just a swipe of our finger, but the downside of all this convenience is that it’s kind of made us lose our manners. Remember those things our parents taught us? Yes, those. With technology at our fingertips, common human courtesy has slipped from our grasp.

Take breakups for example. Back in the day, a breakup would involve one party meeting the other in person or (gasp) breaking up with them over the phone. The phone breakup used to be considered a suckers move, but now it seems almost nostalgically retro. Now, breaking up over text is the norm (even if you’ve been dating for months or years even.) However, even that’s changing. In the past few years I’ve heard way too many stories from people who haven’t even been afforded with a proper breakup. It’s like they bought into a relationship and somehow “actual closure” was the $1.99 upgrade that they didn’t even know about at the time of purchase.

Yes, I’m talking about ghosting. For anyone who’s been fortunate enough to not experience ghosting firsthand or has been living in a cave for the past year, ghosting, according to Urban Dictionary, is “The act of suddenly ceasing all communication with someone the subject is dating, but no longer wishes to date.” Yup, you don’t even get a “hey, I’m going to be really busy for the next 6 years with my gold fish farm so maybe we should see other people” text. But, now there’s actually something worse to add to our passive-aggressive dating vocabulary: mooning.

Nope, I’m not talking about flashing your buttocks to random strangers (although that would probably help expedite the breakup process), According to GQ, “mooning is a harsher form of ghosting, in which users switch their iPhones to “Do Not Disturb” instead of just ignoring their SO like a normal person.”

So, how do you “moon?” It’s all in the iPhone settings. Once you’re there, head to the “Do Not Disturb” option and switch your phone to “Manual.” The term refers to the moon icon that shows up in the status bar once you have enabled the setting. It’s like your phone ghosts your significant other for you.

Yes, people we’ve hit a new low.

While it’s easy to write off “mooning” as yet another dating buzzword, the fact that enough people are using this technique that GQ writes an article about it points to something more much more troubling.

Here’s why mooning needs to stop.

1. Avoiding people feels crappy.

I’ll admit, before I knew there was a term for it, I mooned someone. I was talking to a guy, then I met and started dating someone I really liked. When this happened, I just put his texts on silent. I knew it was a crappy thing to do because I felt it in my gut as soon as I saw that little moon icon. Looking back at the situation, I think I would have felt better if I’d just sent him a note letting him know that I had met someone. Sure, it would have required more effort and might have felt awkward in the interim, but it would have been more fair to him.

2. “Open loops” aren’t good for anyone.

When you don’t have any kind of proper closure on a situation (i.e. it remains an “open loop”), it’s like dead energy lingers in the air. How can we expect to move forward and have good relationships with other people when we still have a moon sign hanging around our phone and life? We owe it to ourselves and the people we date to close those loops.

3. We can do better.

Yes, that’s right humans. We’re better than this. We were given mouths to speak, fingers to type and language to communicate so that we wouldn’t have to ignore each other. Let’s use these things to do better when it comes to dating. If you’re not interested in dating someone, for the love of jeebus, let them know so that everyone can move on with their lives. If you don’t have the bandwidth to give the people you date this basic level of respect, maybe you shouldn’t be dating until you can do better.