Love is unpredictable and doesn’t come with any guarantees. That’s what makes it so exciting. With that said, whenever we enter into a new relationship, one of the key things on many of our minds is “Will it last? Is this person the one?!”

While no one can say for sure exactly how long a relationship will last (except maybe, the people involved), there are certain indicators that can help determine whether the relationship has the potential to last long-term.

Here’s a few ways to tell if your relationship has lasting potential –

1. You can communicate openly –

Talk to any relationship expert and you’ll quickly learn that communication is key to any successful partnership. If you want your relationship to weather the long haul, you need to be able to communicate openly with your partner – and I don’t just mean small talk. I’ve dated plenty of guys that were very entertaining conversationalists; however, when it came to talking about the big “F” (feeeeelings, that is) the conversation completely feel flat or they sidestepped the topic altogether.

If you’re going to be in a relationship with someone and have it go anywhere, you need to be able to talk about how you feel: about each other, the future and the latest Chris Brown scandal. If you can’t talk about everything and anything with your partner, what’s the point? Being together long-term means being able to talk about the fun stuff but also the tough issues like your relationship, money and feelings.

2. You have things in common –

And, I don’t just mean stuff like, “Omg, you like ice cream and being happy? I like ice cream and being happy too!” I’m talking about the bigger picture stuff. Research shows that couples who share common interests, life goals and values are way more likely to last long-term than couples that don’t. Do you share similar lifestyles? Do you want similar things out of life? For example, are you both hoping to start a family? Travel more frequently? Devote your attention to career goals? Do you value you the same things? The older I get, the more I realize how having these things in common is important. Namely, that sharing a common lifestyle that emphasizes similar values is huge.

For example, I’m a highly social person who loves being active and staying healthy but isn’t afraid to indulge in my foodie tendencies and a nice bottle of Merlot. I also value working hard in my career, family, learning, new experiences and social justice. If I met someone who didn’t share a similar approach to life – even if we had really great chemistry – there’s a good chance it wouldn’t work long term. You need to be on the same page about this stuff.

3. There’s mutual respect –

Another tenet of any healthy relationship is respect. Akirah Robinson, a writer and professional break-up coach (yes, that’s a thing!), says, “regardless of how you feel, you deserve nothing less than the utmost respect – from yourself and others.” Do you respect your partners feelings, desires, goals and values? Do you feel like they respect yours? Do you share a healthy understanding of boundaries? Can you happily spend time together, but also time apart? Does your partner respect your need to spend time alone and with other people? Do you provide them with the same respect? In order for a relationship to be healthy there needs to be respect, and appropriate boundaries. These are all things you need to consider when determining whether your relationship has lasting potential.

4. You can be yourself around the other person –

Whenever I ask my friends who are happily coupled what made them choose their partner, I always hear the same thing: “I felt comfortable being myself around them.” Although it’s normal in the early stages of the dating process to only present the best version of ourselves, if a relationship is going to last you need to be able to relax around the other person. Not every moment that you spend together is going to be some epic, romantic date. Being with someone long term also means being able to say, “Tonight I just want to lie around in my pajamas and watch Netflix while enjoying a pizza” and having the other person enthusiastically reply, “me too!”

5. You’re sexually compatible –

Although it’s easy to downplay the importance of sex in a relationship, being able to connect in this way as a couple is really, really important. Recently I asked my Grandma what kept her and my Grandpa married for over 60 years. Her answer: “great sex.” Although it’s slightly shudder inducing to hear your sweet grannie discussing pleasures of the flesh, I think she’s onto something. However, in order to enjoy sex you need to be on the same page when it comes to sexual compatibility – or at the very least, committed to working on this aspect of your relationship so that you can get on the same page. The truth is, some people just aren’t sexually compatible and likely never will be – and that’s totally OK. Sex is part of being human and you deserve to enjoy it with the right partner! So, while it’s easy to shy away from the discussion of sex, it’s definitely a factor to consider when determining whether you’re a good fit for each other long term.