Ok, we know we’re behind on this one. But better late than never and it’s about time we got around to telling you about a new book that was released recently called Data, A Love Story, by Amy Webb. It tells the tale of how Ms. Webb tested and fussed with her online dating profiles and searches in order to help her find Mr. Right. She creates multiple profiles for fictional men to help her figure out the site, expanded her geographic search, analyzed other women’s profiles and pictures and applied SEO methodology to her profile.
The other important thing she did was figure out how to take advantage of the site’s algorithm. Sound complicated? Well, it only gets worse: The way to do that was to figure out exactly what she wanted in a guy. And now we’ve made it sound too easy. She created a complicated point system with each characteristic weighted for its importance in her ideal date and then applied it as she searched and filtered results.
But even if you’re not using a mathematical formula to do it, figuring out what you want in a mate and how to keep your priorities in mind isn’t as simple as it sounds. It’s easy to get distracted by your desire for someone to share your love of sci-fi and to forget that you’re willing to forego romantic evenings of alien movies for someone who will be willing to love your pet ferret as their own. Things like this can be a huge waste of your time, money and emotional energy. That’s why even if you don’t create in-depth spreadsheets and mathematical formulas for calculating the worth of a potential match, it still requires some thought.
Unfortunately, not everything can be searched for on an online dating site. Not even by using the advanced search option. The site will never be able to tell you who will get your sense of humor because your sense of humor can’t be categorized and fit into a check marked box. Here’s where the keyword search comes in. Chances are good that if there’s a popular TV-show or movie (or even a cult sensation) that reflects your sense of humor, the kind of person you’d like to attract may have listed it as one of their favorites too. That’s why getting specific in your profile is just as important as in your searches. Be creative and experiment and make sure to use all of the tools that the site has available.
In fact, that’s probably the most important lesson that Amy Webb offers to online daters: Experiment and put in the effort. Don’t try to shortcut any part of the process. You’re going to put a lot of time into dates so it’s worth putting a lot of time into the other parts of the process including figuring out what you want, perfecting your profile and try new kinds of searches.