What’s your sign? Does it matter? Log on to any popular astrology site and you’ll easily get the impression that when it comes to finding a compatible mate, there’s a set combination of “love signs” that work best together. Whether you believe that love is written completely in the stars or you’re at best, completely skeptical about the role astrology plays in our love lives, one thing is true: this stuff matters to some people. If astrology was completely irrelevant, online dating sites wouldn’t include an option where you can select your astrological sign.

If you believe in it, Astrology can be used as a guide when it comes to relationships and your dating life. Astrology revolves around the understanding that every person is born with an astrological sign that dictates parts of their personality and their romantic preferences. Some astrological signs are simply more compatible with one sign than others. Dating can often feel like you’re lost amidst an endless sea of uncertain possibilities; astrology provides many of us with the illusion of a compass.

Personally, I’m of the belief that astrology does matter to a certain extent. Although I don’t allow astrology to rule my dating choices, over the years I have noticed that there are certain signs that I connect with better – both romantically and as friends. As a Virgo, I tend to gravitate towards other earth signs like Taurus and Capricorn because I just feel like we just “get” each other. I find that Taurus and Capricorn men are a good balance of passion, ambition and practicality – personality traits that make my Virgo heart sing. I’ve also been known to surround myself with Pisces and Cancers, because we often hit it off both as friends and romantic partners. I’ve also had consistently negative experiences dating Scorpio guys (a sign that is one of the worst matches for Virgo.) However, just because certain elements of astrology have proven true in my personal life, I don’t think there’s a hard science to these things.

In 2007, a team from the University of Manchester did a study called “Ten million marriages: A test of astrological ‘love signs’” where they analyzed 10 million marriages, using census data from the U.K. and inferring astrological signs from couples’ birth dates. The researchers found that astrological sign had no impact on the probability of marrying – and staying married to – someone of any other sign.

So, before you write off that cute guy or girl you met online just because they’ve listed themselves as a Libra, here’s a few things to keep in mind.

1. It matters if you think it matters –

Just like any other attribute – religion, political views, favorite TV shows – astrological sign matters only if you think it matters. Simple as that.

In my case, astrology does matter somewhat. I’ve definitely been guilty of using astrological signs as a deciding factor when I meet someone new online. For example, if I’m on the fence about a guy because of some already existing red flags in his profile and then I see that he’s a Scorpio, that’s sometimes enough to make him go from a “maybe” to a “no.”

However, the converse is also true. If I meet someone who seems all around awesome, I’m not going to close myself off to the idea of getting to know them just because their astrological sign isn’t known to be a great match with mine – and neither should you.

2. Past experiences can dictate how you feel about a certain sign –

Years ago, I had two really bad dating experiences: one with a Scorpio and one with a Gemini. Looking back, the reason both of these relationships failed wasn’t because of astrology but rather the people I chose to date. They weren’t a good match for me, period. However, because they had a lot of the classic personality traits associated with their astrological signs, I’ve held on to the belief (perhaps erroneously) that I shouldn’t date anyone from either of these signs. In an effort to broaden my dating horizons, I’m trying to loosen up on my beliefs.

Everyone is different. Just because you had a bad experience with one sign in the past, doesn’t mean that has to dictate your future. Stay open to the possibility of getting along with someone unexpected (you might just be pleasantly surprised!)

3. Use it as a guide, not as a science –

If studies like the above mentioned one from University of Manchester have taught us anything, it’s that people are complex beings and astrology isn’t an exact science. It’s important that you keep that in mind. Don’t discount a potential date just because you don’t think you’ll get along astrologically. You honestly won’t know how you get along until you actually have a conversation or meet in person. In other words, don’t use the stars as an excuse to hold yourself back from meeting someone potentially amazing.