Lately, there seems to be a lot of talk about introverts and extroverts – and how these two different personality types relate to dating.  In short, introverts get their energy from within, while extroverts get their energy from other people. When it comes to recharging, introverts prefer quiet solo time whereas extroverts are energized by being around other people. Which one are you?

Although I definitely can be the life of the party, for the most part I fall in the introvert camp. I need a lot of quiet time to feel balanced. However, contrary to what people may think, introverts aren’t the antisocial party poopers that we’re often made out to be. In reality, introverts are really fun people to be around and date.

Here’s a few reasons why dating an introvert is actually awesome –

1. We love to have deep, absorbing conversations –

If you avoid small talk like Jerry Seinfeld avoids awkward “stop and chats” with his neighbours, dating an introvert is perfect for you. Because our energy is limited, we hate to spend it on stuff that isn’t meaningful to us – like petty gossip or vacuous small talk. Instead, we prefer deep conversations about interesting things that matter and we encourage you to do the same. This is how we form our bonds with people. It’s kind of awesome.

2. We’re OK with you talking about your feelings –

As introverts we’re a sensitive bunch. Yes, we have a lot of feelings – and we spend a great deal of time analyzing them. The plus side of this is that we don’t need you to hide yours. In other words, we don’t expect you to put on a stiff upper lip and pretend everything is “chill” all of the time. We’re totally OK with you talking about how you feel – in fact, we encourage it. As I mentioned above, we like to talk about stuff that matters and feelings are important to us. With that said, we’re also really conscious of personal boundaries (we hate it when people pressure us to talk or engage) so we know when to leave you be. However, if you want permission to be vulnerable and talk about your weird day at work, we will welcome you with a warm hug.

3. We know how to give you space –

Are you tired of always feeling smothered in your relationships? Try dating an introvert. We require a lot of quiet, solo time so we totally get the concept of needing personal space. If you want to go out with your guy or girl friends for a night on the town – we’re totally cool with that. After all, just because we need quiet time doesn’t mean that we expect you to do the same.

4. We know how to chill –

Although we do enjoy a great night out, don’t feel like you have to constantly impress us with wining, dining and elaborate social events. We’ve honed relaxing into an art. Whether we’re spending a mellow night in complete with wine, macaroons and a delicious cheese plate or a super chill day spent drinking, talking and reading by the pool – we know how to chill in style. We all need some down time and an introvert makes for the perfect company.

5. We won’t judge you if you want to spend the night in, eating pizza in your sweatpants and binge watching Nashville on Netflix –

We won’t even expect you to invite us (however, we kind of hope you do because that sounds awesome.) This is one of our ways to recharge, so we totally get it if you want to do the same. Zero judgement!

6. We don’t expect you to text us all day, everyday –

Remember what I said about how we hate to be forced to engage? Constant texting is a major bummer for introverts. Sure, we can ignore texts for a while, but seeing those notifications pop up, knowing that you’re waiting for a response is a sure fire way to cause us anxiety. As for small talk over text: just don’t. When you’re dating an introvert you never have to feel the pressure to text all the time. Although we like to feel safe and valued and like you haven’t fallen off the face of the earth, we only want you to text us when you have something to say – and not just “Sup?”

7. We’re loyal, supportive and value sincerity –

If you’re looking for someone who is always the life of the party and loves the spotlight – we are probably not that person. When it comes to how we spend our time and the relationships we form, we value quality over quantity. This is one of the reasons we make great partners. We also greatly value sincerity. You don’t need to put on any fronts with us. We want you to be yourself, because we want to be able to do the same with you. If you’re looking for someone who is supportive, sensitive, a great listener and knows how to give you your space when needed, you’re going to find dating an introvert a fulfilling experience.