Creating an effective, well put together online dating profile that reflects your personality is not an easy feat. It takes a bit of time, thought and often, input from outside sources. However, despite the plethora of helpful dating articles online, I continue to stumble across men who seem completely clueless when it comes to crafting an appealing online dating bio. Guys, I get it – not everyone is a natural writer, and talking about yourself can feel really awkward. However, it’s time to raise the bar and step up to the challenge.
In an effort to do my part, here’s 5 typical, terrible online dating bio cliches that you should avoid at all costs.
- “Mr. Laidback”
Hey there. I’m a laid-back guy looking to meet new people. I like doing fun things like hanging out with my friends, playing sports, talking, laughing and having fun. I like most music, movies and going out. I enjoy my job, spending time with my family and am generally very laid back about most things.
If you’re also a laid back person who likes to have fun and want to get to know me better, drop me a line. Maybe we could grab a coffee and talk. Don’t worry, I’m laid back. Hopefully you are too.
Why this is terrible:
Besides the fact that you’ve mentioned you’re laid-back, oh, ninety times in your online dating profile?! The main problem with this kind of bio is that it couldn’t be anymore generic. So, you’re “laid-back” – what exactly does this mean? What kinds of sports do you like? Oh, you like to have fun and laugh? And talking?! How original! Me too! (Have you ever met someone who doesn’t enjoy laughing?!) I get that you’re trying to cast a wide net by being as general as possible, but you truly get back what you put out there. If you want to meet someone that you actually click with, show us your personality. Tell us about your passion for hiking or that you’re obsessed with NPR podcasts and brew your own beer. Sell yourself and make us want you, gosh darnit! You’re better than “laid-back.” We all are.
- “Mr. Do Not Fly List”
Real talk ladies, I’m on here to meet my soulmate. I’m ready to settle down and spend the rest of my life with that special, beautiful woman. I own my own home, have a really good job that makes lots of money and have a boat moored on every continent. I’m not afraid to admit that I’m a catch. I’m ready to share my life with someone special that I can spend the rest of my life making happy. If you’re a kind, beautiful woman looking to settle down with a nice guy, shoot me a message and we’ll see where this crazy thing called love takes us.
I don’t play games!!!!
DO NOT CONTACT ME IF YOU –
Play games (I’m done with that!).
Are materialistic and just after my sweet paycheck.
Are a stage five clinger.
Are overweight and don’t take care of your body.
Are just interested in playing me (I’m done with that!!!)
Are a complainer.
Are a Single Mom.
Just want a stand-in for your kid’s deadbeat dad and to take my paycheck.
Are a gold-digger.
Are a mean person.
Are ugly.
Don’t care about my needs.
Have an ex-you’re still obsessed with.
Are just on here to play guys (I’m over you already!!)
Are a tease.
Need me to spend all my time with you.
Just want to hurt guys for fun (I’m done with you!!!)
Have overly high standards (there’s a reason you’re alone!)
Why this is terrible:
Where do I start? I see guys do this all time: include a list of everything that they don’t want in a relationship, instead of what they are looking for. We’ve all been hurt, and it’s natural to want to avoid that in the future; however, this approach just comes across as angry and bitter. Instead of raging about how you loathe gold-diggers, put the focus on your own qualities like, “I love my career and am very independent, and am hoping to find a woman who is the same.” See? So much better!
- “Mr. I’m not sure why I’m here.”
Hey there, just signed up for this thing and checking things out. A couple of my friends told me I should go on here. I usually have no problem meeting people in person, but giving this a shot anyways!
I’m not very good at talking about myself and don’t know what to say, but I’m going to give this a try. Are you ready?
I’m just a laid-back guy looking to meet people. Maybe just looking for friends and then to see what happens. Oh well, here goes nothing! Let’s grab waffles sometime. Or not. Your call.
Why this is terrible:
You’re on a dating site, in 2014….looking for dates?! OH. MY. GOD. Why is this so hard to admit? Everyone and their mom is using online dating these days. The stigma is gone. You’re not fooling anyone with your “I’m not sure why I’m here” BS. Clearly you want to get waffles with someone. Own it.
- “Mr. Keep it in your pants.”
I’m a single dad who loves hanging out, having fun and spending time with his son. I’ve been described by friends as “highly cuddly.” I like to give massages, spoon and love deep kissing. I’ve been told I’m a good kisser. I also have a “secret weapon” – you can guess where 😉 🙂 LOL.
Why this is terrible:
He mentions fatherhood and his love for “deep kissing” in the same paragraph. My guess is that his love for one, precedes the other. And yes, I’ve seen this on an actual profile. Sexual references of any kind should be left out of your bio. It’s too much, too soon – and frankly, quite creepy.
- “Mr. LOL”
Hey there. I’m new on here lol. What’s up?
I’m just a normal guy looking to meet someone special lol, could that be you? I’m 30 years young lol love fishing hiking camping cookouts football and swimming. I want to try skydiving someday but am scared lol, first time for everything right? lol. I also enjoy intense political debates lol, just playing lol. Although I do enjoy me some Noam Chomsky LOL. I’m looking for a lady who is nice, beautiful, laid back, and won’t judge me lol. Is she you?
Why this is terrible:
Congrats! You’ve successfully turned me off by using “lol” instead of proper punctuation. If I see “lol” anywhere in your profile, I automatically don’t take you seriously. Why are you laughing so much?! What exactly is so funny?! Leave the text talk at home and get acquainted with proper grammar and spelling. Why? Because knowing the correct use of “there” and “their” is sexy.
